For as long as I can remember, girls have been vicious. Whether it’s getting possessive over ‘their’ guy or just finding ways to passive aggressively attack you - girls have turned hurting someone into an art form. Guys can throw a few punches, yell a few profanities and the next day they’re eating wings together and watching the game. But girls, they’re a whole different story. They push the buttons you wouldn’t even dare pushing. Ladies, you know what I’m talking about. I know what I’m talking about.
As much as I wish this little issue ended in high school; it doesn’t. It continues into adulthood and sadly really never ends (wow that sentence was definitely a little tough to write). The older I get, the more I realize women need to play on each other’s team. Must we always feel the need to compete, to one up each other, to be the center of attention in a room full of other women? Must we never truly feel proud of another woman’s accomplishments because we want those for ourselves? This picture is so wrong. So so wrong. Why can’t we be on the same team?
Some women can’t genuinely say they’re proud, happy or even hopeful for another woman’s success. Jealousy is a terrible thing. As I listened to a Drake song the other day (go ahead and laugh it up), I heard a line that stuck with me, “the men are jealous and the women all in competition.” I’m not one to say I’ve never been jealous of another woman because I have been. I’m not one to say I’ve never yearned to have what another woman has because that’d be a lie. I’m only human - we all feel those emotions, those pangs of jealousy, and the urge to have what another ‘has’ – whatever that may be.
Sometimes I have to remind myself that life is too short to not be on each other’s team. When another woman gets into a relationship (while you’re still completely single), instead of masking your frown and hoping she won’t notice your sadness - genuinely wish her the best. As women, we need to embrace our own gender; be our own cheerleaders. At some point or another, we’ve all felt that another woman (i.e.: the Regina George of ladies) hasn’t been on our team. It’s disappointing to know that a woman’s world is full of competition, but it’s heartening to know most females stand together and support their fellow lady friends.
If our own gender isn’t on our team then who will be? Next time someone close to you gets engaged, married, gets a promotion or just accomplishes a goal - don’t let that twinge of jealousy get to you. Take that jealousy and turn it into something positive. Cheer her on. Send her a card. Shoot her a text. Give her a call. Say ‘congratulations, you deserve this!’
Whatever it may be – be proud of her. After all, we’re all on the same team.